UMAR Farouk Abdulmutallab is a sexually frustrated loner who nurtured fantasies about holy war, his internet use reportedly reveals.
The twisted mind of the alleged bomber emerged in chilling messages he is said to have posted on an Islamic web forum, UK tabloid The Sun reports.
The Sun retrieved 300 of them in a special investigation into the suspected al-Qaeda fanatic.
In one, posted in 2005 when he was 19, he wrote: "I wont go into too much details about me fantasy, but basically they are jihad fantasies.
"I imagine how the great jihad will take place, how the Muslims will win insha'Allah (God willing) and rule the whole world, and establish the greatest empire once again!"
In another, he said: "Killing is only permitted in jihad."
And in a third, he complained of being depressed during his days at a boarding school in Togo.
He said he never found a true Muslim friend.
And he added: "As I get lonely, the natural sexual drive awakens and I struggle to control it, sometimes leading to minor sinful activities.
"This problem makes me want to get married to avoid getting aroused."
The postings also reveal how he saw soccer as a potentially sinful sport.
"Let's do activities like jogging, running, paint ball, archery (or any other sport of the like that teaches target and aim), swimming, wrestling, weightlifting, martial arts, some form of fitness training and so on."
Abdulmutallab, 23, allegedly tried to detonate explosives molded to his groin on a Northwest Airlines flight approaching Detroit from Amsterdam on Christmas Day.
He visited Britain before coming here to study, and told pals he attended London's Regent's Park mosque.
Using the online alias Farouk1986, taken from his middle name and year of birth, he became a vocal opponent of the war on terror.
And he told how he attended an Arabic course in Yemen, where he trained for his evil bombing mission.
He said other students on the language course came from Britain, the US and Somalia.
Abdulmutallab also talked of the "dilemma between liberalism and extremism" as a Muslim.
He wrote: "I deviate sometimes and when I strive hard, I get tired of what I am doing i.e. memorising the quran etc."
His outpourings will be studied by intelligence experts anxious to discover extremist links in the UK.
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